


Pictures Scream Back at Me

by Irondadandspiderbaby



Series: Post Infinity War [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Gen, He misses his spiderson, Sad Tony, Steve Rogers Is a Good Bro, Steve comforts Tony, Tony Stark-centric, Tony wishes that he died instead of being saved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-12-17 02:49:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21047060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Irondadandspiderbaby/pseuds/Irondadandspiderbaby
Summary: When Tony sees the Picture of Peter Parker among the missing people, things don't turn out as planned.





	Pictures Scream Back at Me

The picture of Peter Parker mocks Tony of what he had lost. The words “I don’t wanna go” replay in his head like a mantra, as if a song is on replay and it never stops plays because it’s told to repeat it; his mind is the CD player. His heart is shattered into a million pieces, but the broom can’t sweep it this time.  His thumb and index finger are confined to the edge of his eyes to keep the tears at bay. The boy’s name turns his mind into a trainwreck. 

“Where is he now?” He asks Steve Rogers. 

“We don’t know,” Steve replies. “He just formed a portal and left.”

Stark nods slowly and bows his head. 

“What if we can find him and get the stones?” Rhodey asks from the other side of his friend. 

“If I knew where he was,” Stark begins. His voice dark yet emotional. “He’d already be dead,” he turns his head to Steve. “Or I’d die killing him.”

“Tones…” Rhodey begs. 

“Sorry, it’s just,” the billionaire sighs then pulls out his I.V. to stand up. “I’m going for a walk.’

Nat walks close enough to put her hand on his shoulder. “Stay, please.”

“You don’t get it, Tasha.”

“Then tell me.” She says. 

He looks down at his feet then into her eyes. They were pleading. “The gauntlet was in my hand then it went down.”

“That’s not your fault--”

“That fucking wizard gave up the stone for my life,” he continues. “I should’ve been me.”

“Don’t say that,” Bruce speaks up. “We need--”

“Don’t lie to me, Bruce. He should've just let me bleed out.”

“Why?” Steve finally speaks out. “So you can die? Not exist?”

“If I died then he’d be here!” The dam breaks. 

Nat pulls him into a hug as he sobs into her shoulder. “He would want you to keep going,” she whispers. “We need you here.”

“I don’t think I can,” he sobs. He feels her tightening her grip. “It hurts, I can’t.”

Steve walks closer to the pair. “I got it, Natasha.” He whispers and lets her give Tony to him.

Tony feels a stronger arms pull him closer and a head caressing his hair. His sobs slowly dim into soft hiccups, 

Steve remembers a song that Tony would hun to calm himself down.

_ “Try to remember the kind of September,  _

_ When life was slow and oh so mellow.  _

_ Try to remember the kind of September,  _

_ When grass was green and grain was yellow.  _

_ Try to remember the kind of September,  _

_ When you were a tender and callow fellow,” _ Steve starts singing softly into his ear. His own rendition of the song seems to ease them both. 

_ “Try to remember, and if you remember,  _

_ Then follow  _

_ Try to remember when life was so tender,  _

_ That no one wept except the willow,  _

_ Try to remember when life was so tender,  _

_ That dreams were kept beside your pillow.  _

_ Try to remember when life was so tender,  _

_ That love was an ember about to billow,  _

_ Try to remember, and if you remember,  _

_ Then follow _

_ Deep in December it's nice to remember, _

_ The fire of September that made us mellow.  _

_ Deep in December our heart's should remember,  _

_ And follow.” _

By the time he’s done with the song, he feels Tony relax into his chest. 

“I think he fell asleep standing up,” Nat laughs quietly. “Get him to bed, alright and take care of him.”

“I will.” He says and picks him up and feels Tony snuggle closer to him. He smiles at him and takes him to his room. 

****

When Steve lays him down on his bed and covers him up, he rubs Tony’s hair away from his eyes. 

“Don’t go.” Tony says, his voice hoarse from sobbing. 

Steve moves to the other side and lays next to him. “I’m right here, go to sleep. We’ll talk tomorrow about getting you back healthy, okay?”

Things aren’t okay now and things won’t be okay for a while, but it gets better. For now, Tony needs his family and his family he’ll have. 


End file.
